Grey on fire

I close these eyes, its too grey outside and I look for color. It’s too tame outside and I am distant.
I am right here and I can’t move my head. I can’t grab sound and music is everything I want. And just as that bass drops, my mind crashes and it splashes all over that naive little heart of mine. Chaos; just waves and vibrations orchestrating a tragedy of thoughts and emotions meeting for the first time and losing themselves silently in incredible noise.
Strange and foreign splinters of an exploded self travel and unravel, shifting cells living and dying all inside one loud echoing song. Sentences lose structure and words break at the misery of needing sound this much. The clarity of a melody breaking down distance and ultimately handing you intimacy and diffusing it under your skin. You no longer seek touch and you are moved from the inside out.
Now that the song is ending the mess is becoming more apparent, and the story is becoming sadder and you can’t help but feel the loss of a leaving tune. You are still right were you are and still can’t move your head, but now you are sedated and elated. Your brain climbs quietly back up to where it belongs stumbling occasionally over residue of sound; and your little naive heart gathers itself together and beats again because that is the only thing it knows.
You open your eyes, it’s still grey outside; but this time you decide to pick yourself up and set that grey on fire.